Saturday, November 21, 2015

Feeling Good?





With Life, comes Death.
Only after a Night, does comes a Day.
After every Storm, shines a Clear Sky.
For every Angel out in world, there is Demon.
Where there is Nightmare, there will be a Dream.
If you believe in God, you have to believe in the Devil.
To every Holy Spirit in the universe, one can not and must not deny the existence of the Unholy Ghost with Unfinished Business.

So shall I ought to have accepted my Darkness for the Light I am so fucking dying moment to know, to understand and in all sense, dying to live with.

Somethings, or shall I say, everything is inevitable in the Nature. The world was made to balance every ounce of positive energy with its counter negative energy. There is no running from the Supreme Truth.

But as I now think as I write, What is the Balancing Lie to this Supreme Truth? What is this Negative Thinking to the Positive Thoughts? How can one really be Feeling Good when one is 'naturally' meant to Feel Bad to keep the Balance in Nature.

Why so much Pessimism to the Optimistic approach I wanted to maintain when I started writing this Blog?

I have no answers to this and million other questions that seems to be constantly feeding on my happiness like a Parasite. But if I think now, doesn't Balance of Nature call upon every Question to have an Answer, no matter how inconsequential and how shallow. There needs to be Balance in Nature.

For the longest time, I have let myself believe that not every Question can have an Answer. But I don't want this anymore.

Life is a Magic of Science - a Balance of Known and Unknown answers. But there are always Answers. We just need to keep searching and I can not and will not give up on them, believing to not believe in my ability to find these answers.

I am definitely not feeling good right now; almost at the worst psychological position of my life. Many things contribute to same. My family,  friends, brothers,  sisters, teachers and the materialistic and vain world we live in.

This whole Blog seems full of shallow and self-centered thoughts. I am just blurring out the random ad-libbing my mind does; a clear sign of Psychological Breakdown.

I am depressed. I am lonely. I talk gibberish. I feel scared. I am not feeling good.

I, the most vain of all words. It is alone, all by itself, yet proud and towering like it is all that matters.
Want, the desire that is never ending. Desire that only feeds more vane. The laziest excuse of not working on oneself, yet feeling cheated by nature on non-completance. You wait and wait but the want never gets fulfilled; knowing very well that one only needs are meant to be satisfied and that too with attitude, hardworking and perseverance.

It's all Garbage I am thinking but this Garbage is what shows on my face, my body and my future.

It's my choice to feel good. I will always feel bad about something but for every bad feeling, nature will have a good feeling.

Feeling Good now?

Memoir of a Farewell

  "Do you even know who goes to church on Thursday? Losers". That's Missy to Mandy in the Season Finale of Young Sheldon. I do...